Giving flowers and cards are two seemingly simple gestures that have received tremendously good responses in my life lately. When my wife Andrea, my office goddesses Joyce & Marisa , my Aunt Sue, and my mother-in-law Gisela, brighten up at the sight of a bunch of fresh cut flowers, then I feel good about myself and my ability to build relationship. Here are 3 ways that giving can add value to the relationships a man has with women in his life.
1. Flowers are tried and true ways to express love. The beauty of giving flowers is that they are beautiful and they communicate to a woman that she deserves beautiful things. Brilliant.
2. Nothing says “I was a jerk” and “I’m sorry” like a bunch of flowers. If you were a jerk after you got her flowers, then getting her flowers again can work, but having two sets of flowers around at the same time can be a clear indication that you are continuing to say and do the wrong thing without doing something about it. Step it up with a brainstorming session that focuses on the heart of the matter. Then figure out additional ways you can express love and gratitude. If she is your partner then try these: a) get a babysitter and take her out to eat. b) set up a picnic dinner in the living room while baby is sleeping. c) Perform Acts of Service such as cleaning the kitchen, sweeping all the floors, or preparing her food.
3. Combine those flowers with a card and chocolate. Ask her ahead of time what kind of chocolate she likes. Is it the really dark stuff? 70% cocoa? 50% cocoa? Sweetened with beet sugar? Cane sugar? Made with Almonds? Orange peel? Cherries? When she gets the kind of chocolate she likes, then she knows you care for her and understand her.
Being understood is one of the most important needs we have, and it is one that you can do right now for someone. When was a time you felt understood and cared for?